The Monday After

 Every Sunday morning for the past few months, I say to myself, "Do I really want to go to church today?"  Usually the answer is no.  Or somewhere in-between.  I'm in-between on a lot of things these days.  If Kris is working graveyards, I can almost always talk myself out of going to church because...well, I have lots of excuses and justifications that are just excuses.  But they work for me (especially since its 1 o'clock church, and that is a killer in and of itself).  Even if I don't want to go, I will usually buck up and go anyway.  I'm screwed from the moment I make that decision because I'm going with this, "Well, I don't want to go but I'm going to suck it up and go anyway" attitude.  Nothing is going to be good with that kind of attitude.

You can imagine that by the time Sunday night rolls around, my attitude has not improved.  In fact, its significantly worse.  When its time to eat dinner, I will have at least 1, but mostly likely 2, crying kids.  They waited all morning to go to church, nobody got a good nap or quiet time, the girls will have played like mad in Nursery (especially since they don't get out much to begin with), and now they are tired and grumpy and hungry (only they don't know they're hungry because they are SO tired).  When dinner is over, all I can think is, "I knew I shouldn't have gone to church."
Then by the time I am ready for bed, especially if Kris is home that night, I will sit and go through this (seriously, I'm pretty sure I do this every Sunday): "I don't know why I go to church, my kids get nothing out of it," "I don't know why I go to church, I don't get anything out of it,"  "I don't know why I go to church, nobody even talks to me," "If I quit going to church, nobody would even notice,"  "I don't think I'll go to church next Sunday,"  "I am a horrible parent."

That would probably be more funny if I was joking, but I'm totally not.  Church. Is. Hard.  Yesterday Kris taught in Elder's Quorum from the George Albert Smith manual.  The lesson was on the Sabbath.  There was a line in the lesson about how God didn't make the Sabbath to be a burden, he made it to bring joy and blah blah blah.  Church is a burden for me.  It just is.  Blame it on the season of life that I'm in, blame it on my bad attitude, blame it on 1 o'clock church, but for whatever reason, right now...its a freakin' burden.  And I don't know how to change that.  I don't know how to change my attitude, because its still hard.  Church feels SO ridiculous, no matter what kind of attitude I have.  It's just hard.

I guess I do it for the habit.  Its Sunday, we go to church.  Annie is loud and completely irreverent during Sacrament Meeting, Emily is a wreck because she hasn't napped, and Jack is wiggly and fussy...but its Sunday and we're going to church, dangit.  Someday it won't be this hard (I know its a long way off and more that I "hope" it won't be this hard), and hopefully by then my kids will know that its what we do on Sunday.  And hopefully they won't think, "It's Sunday, let's go to church so Mom can get mad."


IF I HAD MY LIFE TO LIVE OVER

I would have talked less and listened more.
I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained and the sofa faded.
I would have eaten the popcorn in the "good" living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.
I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather rambling about his youth.
I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just been teased and sprayed.
I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted
in storage.
I would have sat on the lawn with my children and not worried about grass stains.
I would have cried and laughed less while watching television, and more
while watching life.
I would have gone to bed when I was sick, instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren't there for the day.
I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn't show soil or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.
Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I'd have cherished every moment, realizing that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.
When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, "Later. Now go get washed up for dinner."
There would have been more "I love you's" and more "I'm sorry's"
. . . but mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute . . .
look at it and really see it . . . and never give it back. ― Erma Bombeck

August…

I don’t even have anything to blog about.  Seriously.  It’s been one of those months…just trying to get through it!  We did manage to snap some cute pictures of the littles this month though.:)
Me and the girls reading our magazines (for the record, this is not staged…I was looking at a magazine and they just climbed up their with theirs!).

Aren’t they cute?:)

Before church.  I made Jack’s tie.  And he’s freaking ADORABLE in it.

Who am I kidding…he’s adorable all the time, even in jammies.

Pulling weeds.  This Spring, we will definitely have grass.  Definitely.

Family Pictures, June 2012

Fun part of our Idaho vacation…family pictures with the lovely Holli (Kris’s super talented niece).  She got some great pictures!
   
 
   
Seriously, my favorite.  I love these munchkins.

Jack’s First Haircut

Hard to believe a haircut could make this boy any cuter, but it SO did!  Love this kid.

Before

After

Idaho Vacation!!

This year’s big family vacation meant 3 weeks away from home.  3 weeks, 3 kids 3 and under.  Word.  It was a LONG trip…but we had an AWESOME time. 

 

 

We headed out for Idaho on a Wednesday (and arrived in Idaho on Saturday…whew!).  The kids actually did really good the first day, they were grateful for lots of stops (Globe, Show Low, and Gallup).  We were really grateful for the Cracker Barrel in Gallup…especially since the rest of the drive took forever and we got lost!

At the end of Day 1 of our trip, we were in Bloomfield, NM.  My Uncle Mike & Aunt Roanna live there and since we don’t see them often, we thought New Mexico would be a fun way to get to Idaho, instead of our usual route straight through Utah.  We just spent one night there, but it was so fun to see family and visit with them! 

Day 2 of our trip was So. Long.  We went from Bloomfield up through Colorado and over to Utah. 

We thought we’d go see the Arches in Moab, but the kids were whiny and who knew the first arch in the park was still another 30 minute drive?  So we skipped that and just kept driving.  That’s what the first two days of our trip seemed…we just kept driving.

Day 2 of our trip got us to Salt Lake City, where we stayed for two nights.  Do you know what driving for two days straight will do to little girls? 

We spent Friday bumming around Temple Square and downtown SLC.  Sometimes I miss all the fun things Utah had to offer…there’s always something going on!  The girls loved climbing the steps of the temple.  Annie knocked on the door and said, “Jesus, let me in.  It’s me, Annie.”  Bless her little heart.

  

 

After a fun morning at Temple Square, we headed to City Creek Center downtown.  There we discovered something amazing.  Fountains that are at ground level for you to play in.  I’m sure they have these in a ton of other places, but I’ve never seen them and neither has Annie.  She was amazed and had so much fun running through them, especially since there were lots of other little kids playing with her.  I even ran through a couple times!

After playing in the fountains, we did some shopping, ate some delicious pizza from Sbarro and had some yummy treats from Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory.  Then we went back to the hotel for some swimming!

Apparently swimming is exhausting.  Like driving.:)

Before we headed out to Idaho on Saturday morning, we met up with one of my very most favorite people ever, Tristen, for breakfast at Bee’s Café in Roy.  Love this girl.

 

 

We told Les & Karryn we would be arriving in Idaho Sunday…but really, we meant Saturday.:)  We meant surprise!  Les & Karryn celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary this year, which is a pretty big deal, so we wanted to make a big deal out of it!  Eric & Leah set up a dinner at Tomato’s and we were able to be there for the surprise.  And they were definitely surprised!  It was so much fun to get to see their faces and celebrate with them.

Grandma with Jack…

his first time to get snuggles from Grandma!

 

We spent the next two weeks playing in Idaho, doing lots of fun things!

 

Miracle Hot Springs

 

 

 

 

 

 Tormenting the cat

 

Music in the park

 

 

 

Idaho Joe’s

Baking with Grandma

       

The last part of our time in Idaho was spent in Rexburg, Idaho Falls and Pocatello for the Neibaur Family Reunion (Karryn’s side of the family).  We started off on Thursday in Rexburg visiting Aunt Rose at the nursing home she lives in.

Uncle Clyde, Karryn, Aunt Rose & Aunt Iris

Thursday night we drove to Idaho Falls where Kris and I were able to go to the temple and do sealings.  It was a beautiful temple, I was so grateful that Karryn and Julianne stayed with the kids so we could go.

Friday and Saturday were the Neibaur Family Reunion in Bancroft (30 miles from Pocatello).  Friday night we all met at Uncle Clyde’s home where we ate some yummies and visited.  I hadn’t met most of Kris’s family, so it was a fun time to get to know everybody.  I had a really great time getting to know Aunt Iris, who came from Oregon and some of her family.  Saturday we spent most of the day at the church in Bancroft where we had lunch and a talent show.  It was so much fun getting to see everybody…can’t wait till it happens again!

 

 

Aunt Iris, Les, Karryn, Aunt Norma, Uncle Clyde, Uncle Neal

For the last part of our trip, we spent a couple days in Las Vegas.  Luckily (by some small miracle!), Les, Karryn and David were able to join us for the fun!  We stayed at our timeshare resort and got a Penthouse.  It was huge and had so much room for the kids to play.  We spent Tuesday down on the Strip at the Venetian.  The girls and I rode on a gondola and were serenaded!

We also spent some time at the Bellagio and the Mirage…

 

The awesome thing about having Grandpa in Vegas with us?  He could get all the kiddos to sleep.:)

Other things we did in Vegas…ate at the Circus Circus buffet and SWIMMING!!

We had a super fun trip…it was rough to come home, especially since Kris had to go back to work the day after we got home.  We love our family so much, we really enjoyed getting to see everybody and playing and visiting!  We’re so blessed.